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Implicit Theories of Relationships: Who Cares if Romantic Partners Are Less than Ideal?

University of Houston, knee{at}uh.edu

Aruni Nanayakkara

University of Houston

Nathaniel A. Vietor

University of Houston

Clayton Neighbors

University of Houston

Heather Patrick

University of Houston

Perceived discrepancy between one’s ideal and actual partner has been shown to predict relationship satisfaction. The goal of two studies was to examine whether implicit theories of relationships moderate this association. In Study 1, data from 177 undergraduates in romantic relationships showed that the perception that one’s partner falls short of one’s ideal was generally linked to lower satisfaction, except under cultivation (high growth/low destiny). In Study 2, data from 61 couples showed (a) viewing one’s partner favorably was associated with more satisfaction but less so among those who were higher in growth belief; and (b) cultivation predicted increased positivity, whereas evaluation (high destiny/low growth) predicted increased hostility when discussing discrepancies in how they and their partner view the relationship. Results are discussed in terms of the controversy over idealization and authenticity in romantic relationships.

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